Strategy & Tragedy: CEO Stories with Steph Melodia is the best business podcast for curious entrepreneurs. Hosted by Top 20 Female Founder, Stephanie Melodia, Strategy & Tragedy features candid interviews with entrepreneurs who have scaled - and failed - their businesses - sharing their lessons in entrepreneurship along the way. From Nick Telson-Sillett who achieved financial freedom after selling DesignMyNight (on The Wildest Exit Day in History™) to Emmie Faust, the founder of Female Founders Rise, who opened up about her breakdown on the road to discovering her mission in supporting female founders.
This is one of the best podcasts to listen to if you're looking for educational and inspirational content on Spotify, Apple, Google, Amazon, YouTube or watch the clips on Instagram, LinkedIn, TikTok, or YouTube Shorts.
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Stephanie Melodia interviews Simon Alexander Ong, business strategist, international keynote speaker and author of 'Energize: Make the most of every moment.' Simon's work has got him invited to speak on Sky News, BBC Radio London, and LBC Radio. His insights have also been featured in the likes of Huffington Post, Forbes, and The Guardian.
Watch on YouTube via the link below or keep reading for the transcript:
SM: We have to open the conversation with the whole energy piece we're here with your book Energize. I think when I first met you I actually said to you there's so much out there in terms of time management - I don't know how many videos books everything is around how to organize your day how to organize your time but actually through my own personal experience of burnout I realized your energy managing your energy is far more important so this totally speaks to me - why did you want to write about energy Simon?
SO: Because like many people I've gone through periods of my life where I burnt out I was exhausted and I kept asking myself what was I doing wrong that kept getting me to this position and I realized that I hadn't been focusing on my on my energy and when I looked at some of the people that were doing so many amazing things with their lives it wasn't because they were the fastest or the smartest or the most intelligent but they were able to manage their energy well so they could thrive and they could show up in every situation they were in with a sort of energy that Drew people towards them and that made me look at my my own self and the first place it started was my physical energy I realized I didn't get enough sleep I was eating junk and I just didn't have time to exercise I was beginning my career in finance and so in in an industry like that you're going to have long hours and I sacrificed a lot of my physical energy in order to pursue a a career in this industry but when I transition out of that into the work I get to do today physical energy was the first thing I focused on and it really gave me the foundation to then work on the other areas of energy management my mental energy emotional energy and spiritual energy and I realised that once I was listening to my body and working with it and not against it so many more things were possible.
SM: It's so ironic that the physical energy piece you know not getting enough sleep not eating right is often the first thing that goes for many people when actually it's the most important you know we always think I've got to stay up late and get this assignment done or I need to set the alarm a bit earlier or I don't have time to sort out my meals or just eat you know whatever's available so what are some of I want to ask you what are some of the Practical tips that people can learn from this podcast and then what are also some of the deeper more surprising um helpful aspects of increasing your energy that that people may not expect to hear?
SO: Sure so first of all if I talk about the different dimensions of energy I've touched on physical we've got mental we've got emotional we got spiritual so I give like a summary of of each of them so physical energy really is about sleep nutrition and movement uh when you think about productivity it always begins with getting sufficient rest if you're not getting sufficient sleep and rest when you wake up of a morning you're already going to be behind you're going to be playing catchup all day it's like running a 100 m Sprint starting 20 M behind the starting line so for sleep it's understanding that you have to get sufficient sleep in the evenings have a transition from work to sleep get solid quality sleep and you wake up much more focused and one of the things that can help with this is planning your day the night before so when you plan your day the night before not only do you increase the probability of getting better sleep because you have less on your mind you've downloaded all your thoughts onto paper but when you wake up you know exactly what your priorities are - you know what you must focus on in the morning. Most of us we wake up in the morning and we waste our energy worrying about what is going to happen today what are we going to wear today... We have all these trivial decisions to make that we could have made the night before. Nutrition is understanding that if we focus on eating energy rich foods if we focus on having a diet that is moderation of different things that is has a has exposure to like vegetables plants whole foods that can really help give us the energy rather than weigh us down a energy that again helps us navigate the day. And then exercise is one of the fastest ways that you can get an energy uplift. I mean just imagine the last time you went to the gym and you had an intense workout how did you feel coming out of that? And whatever problems the day would have thrown you away you would have dealt with them no problem, but if you haven't got sufficient rest if you haven't moved your body if you're feeding yourself with junk and a problem comes up in your day guess what? You're not going to respond in the same way.
SM: I'm aware that my listeners are very smart people because obviously they tune into this show and I feel like a lot of us know these things but it's another thing when you put them into practice - is there any advice that you could give to help people break that cycle I mean
asking for a friend here as well but you know I'm definitely I'm a huge victim of this like I have a very rare sleep disorder myself so the whole subject of sleep and rest is something that I feel very passionately about love chatting about but when you do get into that cycle I think that's the problematic thing you you stay up late again not like this is coming from firsthand experience but you stay up late because maybe you woke up later than you wanted to you were on that back foot so you put in those extra hour you drink a bit more coffee not really great for your G either you want to try and catch up because you feel like you behind and it's and then the next day you've got that 24-hour cycle that repeats so what can you what advice could you give to help anyone to like break that cycle and shift from I know that I should be doing this to actually implementing it?
SO: Well, the first thing is as you said there's so many things that we know we should do in order to live a healthier and a more productive life but we don't do uh and one of the reasons is when we think about the things we know we must do and the first thing that comes to my mind as I speak to you about this are New Year resolutions what happens is at the beginning of every year we have all of these resolutions uh but for me they're they're they are just a wish list they're a list of interests I'm interested in going to the gym more often I'm interested in going out and running outdoors more often and so on but if you're only interested in something I guarantee you're not going to take any action on it because interest is indecision interest is 50/50 if it happens great but if it doesn't, there's always next year there's always tomorrow the reality is you you'll never make any real changes so you've got to move from interest to Commitment. I'm committed to live a new lifestyle with this as my routine. Now for that to occur you have to be connected to the Future you - so what would that future version of you look like if he or she was getting sufficient rest exercising on a regular basis and eating healthy how would that person feel energetically how differently would that person show up and then operate from that future self the reason we don't take action is we're operating from our past selves our past selves they that past self is deciding what decisions we make in the present but if we start to operate from our future self such that we work backwards from our future self those decisions become a lot easier I love this so much
SM: Simon you're getting me so excited because the whole topic of self-identity is something I feel very passionately about because it's how you saying the past selves it's how we've always identified ourselves it's what whatever label we've assumed and I think not only whatever identity we hold about ourselves but what everyone else has come to know us to be like is another you know without sounding unkind to friends and family people around us but it's almost like another prison because everyone else has those expectations and labels around you that's just kind of another level to break through of that so it does take a certain amount of Courage I think to get to move closer to that future you.
SO: Absolutely and that's why Clarity on that is so important because when you're clear on what that future you is and you constantly work from that identity beautiful things start happening I mean for example the gap between where you are in the present and who you want to be in the future that starts collapsing and when you think about the choices to make what's the right or wrong choice nobody can make that decision for you except you but if you are clear on what that identity is you don't have to worry about making a choice because it will come naturally to you if you have a visual of this person living a healthy life accomplishing amazing things living on the edge of their comfort zone and then you are faced with a decision to make if you work from that identity it's already made for you and this is where visualization comes in.
SM: I'm super privileged and grateful to have had such incredible guest yourself included Simon on the show and one of them includes Maya Raichoora who's developed this you know this profile of being the visualization expert so listening to that episode if you haven't already she shares lots of tips and anecdotes and the science behind visualization and what I know has come up a lot with that whole subject piece is I can't remember the exact name of the term but some people do have this mental condition that doesn't allow them to visualize or they struggle to visualize so are there any other techniques that you could suggest when it comes to getting that Clarity of that future self?
SO: If you have difficulty visualizing an alternative is embracing what I call a real life vision board uh so you are immersing your senses in the present and what that future would feel like so for example if uh one of the things I have on my vision board is to drive a blue top of the range Tesla vehicle but I have difficulty visualizing that well what I can do in the pr is I can go to my local Tesla dealership and book a test drive in Tesla the exact model that I want to have in the future so what's happening is I'm exposing my senses biologically and chemically to that future as if it's happening in the present even though I don't own it yet it's flooding my body with the chemicals that this is possible because I'm actually doing it now I'm actually in this car driving I can feel it I can smell it so that's an alternative is to immerse yourself in a real life vision board if you have to desire to to stay in a house in Hollywood Hills in Los Angeles at some point in your future Airbnb one or two nights of one of those houses when you're over in Los Angeles and suddenly again your senses are immersed in that as if this future is happening right now in the present and what that does is it raises the motivation and the inspiration inside of you to take the steps forward to make it happen.
SM: I love that so much Simon and I feel like that's the best excuse to just go and like take a test drive of a fancy car. Anyway have you ever done anything like that yourself for a particular goal that you've had?
SO: Yeah so at the beginning of my entrepreneur Journey one of the things I wanted to do was to join a members club and I didn't know which one to join I used to see in the papers lots of celebrities coming out of a a club in Mayfair called Annabelle's and I said how cool would it be to be in Annabel's and to see what's going on there to meet some of the people in in this members Club but at the beginning of my journey I had no idea of how to get in and I knew membership would be expensive and you have to get referred and and invited to be a member and then I was reading uh a con Nas magazine in W Smith and at the back of this magazine it said there was an event being held at Annabel's for conde Nast readers and it shared the event bright link and I said okay I'm not going to buy the magazine but I'm going to take a photo of that poster I'm going to go to the eventBrite link and book myself a ticket I think it was £45 ticket so for me £45 was a small amount to be in that members club hearing a conversation on stage with a couple of people about travel but then to mingle with the people at that club so I was I spend the whole night I think it was about 4 or 5 hours in the club I got to meet a host of amazing people but I was looking around this place thinking wow you know I'm actually living this vision board I'm here in Annabel's there an amazing guests here the talk is thoroughly insightful and I got to meet Ben Fogell who was on TV shortly before this event and it was just it was just a beautiful moment.
SM: And did you subsequently sign up or was that event enough of a fix for you?
SO: It was enough of a fix for me to show me I could get there I mean I'm now part of different members clubs but at that point it just inspired me to to move forward I love that and when we think about energy I think the difference between motivation and inspiration is motivation is more of a push energy and so that's why often you have to keep motivating yourself because you'll push a little bit and you'll push yourself a bit more inspiration however has more of a pulling energy so when I was in this club and I immersed myself in various real life VIs board uh examples what happened is that that knowledge that this can be possible pulled me forward and I found myself waking up the next morning inspired by by the smell of possibilities I didn't have to motivate myself I was up straight away I was like how am I going to make this happen who do I need to speak to what action must I take my mind was in the land of action orientation.
SM: I love that so much Simon I'm genuinely getting so excited this is honestly like one of my top favorite subjects to talk about so it is such a such a treat to sit down and chat with you anyway but also some of my favorite things I think just to underscore for the listeners as well visualization like I am a very visual kind of instinctive person so for me it comes extremely easily I actually was doing I was practicing visualization dare I say manifestation as well before it was even a thing before I was even fully conscious that that was what I was doing but as I said I do know there are others who struggle with it they obviously our minds will work in wonderfully weird different ways so the fact that you can go and make that vision board a reality I'm going to take that advice anywhere I'm going to go and book a test drive with the Porsche tomorrow.
SO: It's powerful because it once you are connected to the vision of who you want to be and you believe it is possible that's key you have to believe it is possible one thing saying this is my vision board this is what I want to achieve I'm going to be in this stage I'm be on this magazine but the next question is do you actually think that's believable? If you do and this is why there's always two sales which I mentioned in the book the second is selling you to others and the first is selling you to you if you can sell you to you guess what the energy that you bring in every interaction in every conversation in every space that you show up will attract opportunities towards you because that is what you admit to the people that come into your field what happens is when you show up this belief that I'm meant to be here I deserve to be here people feel that energy.
SM: Yeah, absolutely. And what I'll just mention for any of the slightly more skeptical listeners on the show is this is backed by Neuroscience like categorically obviously you need to put in the work but I do very firmly believe in the power of the Mind in how our subconscious finds these patterns and opportunities and I guess more so to your point is that energy that we're putting out there how we're holding ourselves these things that we do attract isn't just this kind of woo-woo. I just feel like it's so easily dismissable.
SO: It's easily dismissable but I think if we pause and we step back and we reflect on our own life I'm sure if you're listening or watching to if you're listening or watching this there have been moments in your life that you would have said to yourself wow I met this person at just the right time if I didn't meet this person or if this didn't happen I wouldn't have had this opportunity I wouldn't have had this referral for this chance to speak at this event or I wouldn't have got introduced to to my new company so what happens is that the universe is always out there working for us giving us signals giving us Clues but we have to be aware of these so-called coincidences nothing is a coincidence we were meant to meet people for reason but if you're not attuned to that energy you're not going to heed those signals but if you're present and you're living in the moment in The Power of Now what happens is you're going to be attuned to these moments of coincidences and then ready to take action take action and it might be the fact that you've bumped into the same person three times maybe that's a sign from the universe that you're supposed to strike up a conversation and before you know it you find out you were meant to meet meet that person because an opportunity has
SM: Just as you mentioned a sign from the universe do you believe in some kind of higher power Destiny Karma do you believe in these other external forces at play?
SO: Absolutely I mean if if you think about it from a science perspective the universe is Just Energy. You know we are Just Energy uh if you if you look in uh into an atom you'll notice that in the construct of an atom all that space in between the atom is just full of energy now what that means is that we have the ability to influence what that energy is. To give an example - and it's probably something all listeners can relate to - imagine you arrive at the airport and you are about to board a flight and before you've gone through security you realize you've just left your passport at home and you're stressing out and your thoughts are going all over the place what do I do do I go back home get my passport if I miss my flight can I get on another flight. Now, even though the outside temperature hasn't changed your internal body temperature is rising so what happens is you start to feel sweaty Palms you start to feel hotter you start to get flushes because you just don't know what to do in this moment and you feel like you're in this moment of chaos now all all of that has simply been generated by thought alone the thought of what is happening around you and whether you can actually make this flight has increased your Eternal body temperature and it creates this physical sensation of stress in your stomach we also get that every week if you if you're in the job you hey Sunday nights and Monday mornings you probably can relate to that you have this physical tension inside of your stomach now if our thoughts can make us ill is it not possible that our thoughts can make us better our thoughts can make us better as well and that's the power of the Mind what we bring into our thinking we bring into our reality because our mind is like a Target machine when we give it something to focus on that's what it focuses its energy on and it's either going to be positive or negative energy is infectious it just doesn't matter which thing. If we spend time around negative thoughts and energy, guess what, we're going to feel more negative and the same with if we spend time around positive thoughts and energy, we're going to feel more positive.
SM: Absolutely and I love that airport example feel like a lot of us can relate to that even listening to your anecdote there I can even feel myself getting a bit nervous just imagining it. So we came quite far away from the different types of energy but I haven't forgotten so let's rewind so we sort of dove in there on the physical energy piece so tell us a bit more about those other types of energy.
SO: Sure so mental energy really is about your ability to focus uh which is becoming an increasingly important skill in a world that is getting more distracted and busier the ability to cultivate a resilient mindset uh and also to act as your Creative Energy uh we all have creativity as we grow that tends to be suppressed uh because of conforming to society and conforming to other people's standards emotional energy is all about relationships relationships with yourself and relationships with those you spend time with and then spiritual energy is about meaning and purpose are you doing something that makes you feel alive are you doing something that brings out the best in you because a lot of us are exhausted not because we are physically doing too much but because we are doing too little of the things that bring us joy and because we are running someone else's Race So when you are high on spiritual energy you feeling flow because you're doing something that gives you energy you're doing something where you can express your gifts and your skills and your talents when you're low and spiritual energy you're doing something that either goes against your values or does not allow you to express who you are.
SM: And can you nullify or validate we started off with the physical energy piece I would expect that to be the first Domino everything else is that correct?
SO: I would say so because I mean I start my book the very first chapter is called invest in your health because so many of us make Health a side hustle a side hustle we've got to stop making it a side hustle because if you don't have good health you can't accomplish much else simple as that you know the healthy person will have lots of hopes and dreams the sick will only have one yeah and so if you've got a good foundation of physical energy that allows you to then look at the other areas and address them in your life.
SM: You know something I always think of I I'm really interested in kind of language and Linguistics and this plays into you know our selft talk and um this is a bit of a like a bit of a weird confession but I absolutely love in the English language where sometimes we refer to ourselves as "my person" and I love it so so you say for example like "I'm going to take my person to bed" and I love it so much because it's a reminder that we are that we are not just our bodies but instead we are this whatever you want to call the soul the being the person inside of these physical vessels that you know we've been putting on Earth you know I'm not going spiritual or religious or anything but I think this just further compounds the argument for prioritizing the physical health the physical energy because we are all kind of there's no escaping these these persons that we're occupying.
SO: And we only have one body if we don't treat our body well then how are we going to live a long life how are we going to have the energy to accomplish all the other things we want to do exactly and so that's why it begins with physical energy.
SM: The reason I see it as a domino effect is because I've experienced it myself so I was just going to ask you this actually so what was your catalyst ?
SO: My Catalyst was the second job I had after Lehman Brothers. Leman Brothers was my first job out of University 14 months later it collapsed uh on the back of the financial crisis I was in a second job in in a hedge fund long hours punishing work um everything was sacrificed sleep food movement and it got to a point where I was completely burnt out. It was impacting my relationship with my girlfriend and so I came to the decision to resign and I moved deliberately to another job in finance because I didn't know anything else. My whole career up until that point was all in finance.
SM: Can I just ask sorry to jump in really quickly but just at this point in the story was there so you'd been kind of run dry like low energy or no energy Reserves was there something specific that helped cuz I know it's especially if this is your first job to go up to your manager and say look this is it I'm quitting was there something specific that really sort of was the nail
in the coffin?
SO: Yeah so it it was Christmas one year and I remember going to some client entertainment at the end of a long day and before I went downstairs the the club was on the ground before I went downstairs I texted my girlfriend and said I will be back home um taking the last train so don't wait up with me I should be back about 1: 1:30 in the morning and I went down I checked my bags into the cloak room uh of course I get no network because now under ground and then the evening starts and there's lots of nice entertainment the drinks start flowing and before long I'm intoxicated somehow I find myself stumbling out of the club calling a taxi I end up home more around 334 in the morning and I look at my phone and there's Missed calls there's messages because my girlfriend rightly so was worried about where I was and and she was still up worrying where where is he and so I get her and I'm trying to escape the conversation I knew I had to have with her and I think it was that which really pushed me over the edge to make a decision to change, because I realized in that moment that if I didn't change I would not only stand to lose my job but I would lose any potential for this relationship to succeed so that was really the moment that kind of got me to think about where I was heading. It was tough because I grew up in in a society where as men we we weren't allow to talk about our feelings you know it's more about pull your socks up get on with it - it's about being tough it's about facing things head on and not really sharing what you're going through and so having this opportunity to really speak into that and and to share with her I think it was very healthy for me and so I made that change I deliberately moved into another job in finance but much more comfortable I should say relatively it was 9 to 5 it was a research job but it gave me the time in the evenings and weekends to start focusing on my physical energy to have time to exercise to have time to meal plan to eat healthier time to actually get rest and sleep in my in my schedule and so that really was the beginning of addressing my physical energy interesting rebuilding those fundamental blocks.
SM: I was wondering if there would be more of a story here because there's always that moment where we know that something's not right but to actually take action sometimes we do need those things to happen, so the other things I want to come on to here with you is you're obviously such a powerful Storyteller, you are public speaker, so I want to ask you about the power of Storytelling in business. So most the listeners are entrepreneurs, they've got their own businesses, startup Founders... Storytelling is absolutely vital especially if there are some more kind of technical Founders and they know they need to but I really know where to start I'd love to hear some of your tips on why it's important and how to be best storytellers.
SO: So first of all stories are important because they create an emotional connection with the listener and emotion is nothing more than energy. Now, when you feel an emotion or feeling from a story it touches your heart now once it touches your heart you're inspired and then the next phase of that is influence what is the action you're going to take as a result of feeling a certain way and this is why stories are so important if you look at many businesses fundamentally they don't do much different you can look at one industry and look at all of the companies that operate in that industry and say by and large they sell the same products but what differentiates the products is the stories that are attached to those products and how we tell them is the creation of a brand you know if someone hears a story about this product they want to become part of the story because they feel an association with it so to give an example Apple sells mobile mobile phones now lotss of other companies also sell mobile phones but the brand and the story they tell is this idea of thinking different it's this idea of creative Pursuit we for the people that are pushing the edges pushing the boundaries that think different that don't mind standing out from the crowd to embrace their uniqueness now immediately that's a story and that's a story that people will resonate with and identify themselves as part of something bigger and so if you can understand the power of good storytelling you can then move away from phase one of communication and phase one of communication is informing any of us can inform you know you give somebody some messages to share with their employees or their team anybody can just inform people the second phase is Inspire and Inspire is all about storytelling it's all about emotion and then the third phase is influence can you now once you've got them engaged move them towards action and that's the power of a good communicator.
SM: This is where it's so non-negotiable for Business Leaders right so as you're starting to build teams attracting Talent that's where it's more crucial to move from information to influence.
SO: The story just I'm thinking of those phases the story that comes to my mind is of Clarence Johnson so in 1943 he received a call from the US Department of Defense and he was told that German jet fighters had just appeared across the skies of Western Europe and the Americans wanted the counter punch and on this call he was given this mission that they were thinking about undertaking which was to build America's first military jet fighters except what happened is they had two things working against them one was the time constraint they needed something done quick and second this was the first of his kind so they didn't have time for mistakes to happen this had to be perfect but within the time frame they were able to deliver clown Johnson was able to build a separate team out from the main company to focus on developing this jet fighter and he did it faster than the timeline allowed for him but the interesting thing is when you look at the story it wasn't that he told the team our goal is to build a jet fighter in record time that's not very emotional he focused on a vision he focused on a story when he communicated to his team he said we stand here on the precipice of History we have the power to change the future of humanity what you are doing here is going to help Humanity survive if we don't who knows what will happen they were attached to something bigger than themselves they realized they could be the saviors of the future of humanity and then everyone came together United as a team to create America's first military jet fighter in record time.
SM: Wow Simon that is such a powerful story, I love that. Some inspiration for our Founders as well setting a vision communicating it by getting that emotional Buy in it's it's bigger than yourselves. Simon very sadly we're running out of time so my traditional closing question on the show is you know given the title and tragedy you know well not to be super negative but one of the core beliefs is that often the best lessons can come from the biggest mistakes I think we already talked about you know we covered the burnout your episode and what kind of led you to discovering the more energy management the physical kind of burnout piece - is there anything else you'd like to share with our listeners?
SO: Yeah I mean connected to the theme of Strategy & Tragedy I think the most tragic experience I went through was when I was 17 years old I lost my mom to an unfortunate accident. It was very unexpected it wasn't like you know she had a disease and we knew that her time was going to come it was completely out of the blue but what that taught me is how life how short life is life is short I mean we think we have forever but we don't and when you look at life let's assume you live until 80 you are going to live in that span of time 4,000 weeks or 29,000 days which is not a lot but when you appreciate just how short life is you begin to make different decisions you begin to channel your energy into truly living and more importantly you acquire one of the greatest skills there is which is to collapse that gap between idea and execution most of us have such a huge gap between idea and execution but when you collapse that Gap that is how you make progress and that is how you set foot on a more fulfilling path in life.
SM: Simon that's such powerful words to end this on thank you so much for that I just want to mention as well you're saying about 4,000 weeks the book 4,000 weeks by Oliver Burkeman I mean after you've read energised by Simon Alexander Ong add that one to the list as well because that's also it talks to that point is super powerful Simon thank you so much for your time coming on the show it's such a pleasure to have somebody like you on here such you know interesting insightful tidbits and stories I'm sure that all of our listeners have taken away something really practical here with you
SO: Thank you so much for having me.
Strategy & Tragedy: CEO Stories with Steph Melodia is the best podcast for curious entrepreneurs and ambitious founders. Learn from those a few steps ahead of you in these candid interviews of the highs and lows of scaling and failing business.
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